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'Door prize' is no reward for bikers
Toronto Star, Saturday, December 24, 1994
By Lew Gloin
F" You rakin' or achin'?"
That's courier-talk for "are you raking in the money (lots of calls) or
aching for the lack of it (idle)?"
Bike couriers (bikers to the cognoscenti) have a jargon all their own
and Michael Jursic, one-time courier and now full-time student, is
compiling a lexicon of "esoteric trade terms that might bewilder the
average suit who encounters bikers on an elevator."
Most of us, unlike the suits, are more likely to encounter them on the
street, zipping through Toronto traffic with screamers (packages that
must be delivered immediately or sooner), sometimes doing an endo
(getting thrown over the handlebars) or getting a door prize (hitting
the door of a vehicle as it opens into traffic). Sometimes the call (a
pick-up and drop) is an easy one, a biker may shyshe (ride with
exceptional speed) - "right up to Bloor with no stops!"
The package is the all-important livelihood of the bike courier; there
is nothing more important and a biker encounters grief over late
delivery. Packages are sometimes passed off to drivers (couriers who
drive motor vehicles). Some packages are delivered by Metropassers
(walkers).
Check me clean (let me know when all your calls are off), a dispatcher
may say on the radio. A simple clear will do as reply, but
C-double-A-F-B (clear as a f---ing bell) is a more forceful answer.
R-F-T (Right, f---ing there) is an emphatic response to a query about
the biker's proximity to the next pick-up.
Bike couriers face many perils: along with a door prize or endo comes
the T-bone, in which the bicycle is broadsided by a car or truck (with
often fatal result) or by another bicycle (almost as dangerous).
A lesser peril is the no-bell prize, awarded by a police officer for
lack of a warning bell on the bike.
FirstCan is First Canadian Place, the immense office building at King
and Bay. It is also called Can or The Can. Jursic says it was once a
hangout for bike couriers.
"The management . . . put a stop to it by having security guards harass
bikers who happened to be there."
We may look forward to two annual (and illegal) bike courier races,
which may take place on Valentine's Day ( St. Valentine's Day Massacre)
and Halloween ( Halloween Scramble). Or they may not.
Jursic, an English major at York University, collected these terms (and
others) for a book, Hardcorps: Stories About Bike Couriers In Toronto.
It's self-published. You may buy one at the Massacre or the Scramble.
Hey, keep the rubber side down, man!
* A Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all readers. You are my most
valuable resource.
Lew Gloin's Words column
appears weekly in the Arts section.
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